Dating when you are a single parent

Many single parents struggle for months or even years about whether or not they should date, a lot of single parents feel guilty about dating again or as if because they are parents they have no right to try and find love again with someone else. Whether or not you date is completely up to you but it is important to remember that dating and having relationships as single parent families is completely different than dating and having relationships is when you are simply single

If you do decide to get out there and date again here is some important advice that you should consider before going out there:

  1. Your children come first: your relationship with your children as a mother or father is your priority, it will outlast any relationship you have with any potential date or even boyfriend. It will also inevitably affect the way your relationship or dating life goes. Ensure that your children fully understand that your date or boyfriend in no way shape or form replaces them and you love them more than you love anybody.


  1. Always present yourself as a single parent: no it is not your title and it does not define you, but it also shouldn’t be kept away as some kind of dirty little secret in fear that if a guy you’re interested in knows you have children he will lose interest. This is very likely to happen, that is why when you fist even get into conversation you should let your date now that you have children so that he can make a decision on whether he can handle it or if he’d rather not be part of it. Anyone you get involved with should know that you are a parent first; if they are not willing to accept that you come as part of a package then they are not right for you and should be forgotten.



  1. Take it slow: don’t rush your children and your date into meeting each other unless you are a couple and are completely sure that the relationship is for the long-term, you don’t want your children meeting every guy you see, it will save you and your children from a lot of disappointment and heartache. If your relationship ends it could really hurt your children and you don’t want that.


  1. Learn and move on: learn from the mistakes that were made in your last relationship but don’t let it affect how you see men and how your date goes. It may have been a while, just try and be natural and let conversation and laughter flow freely, you’re bound to feel a bit nervous and anxious that is completely normal, don’t feel as though your date sees you differently because you are a parent, they know you have a child and are still interested in you as a person so don’t blow it by assuming they are judging you.


You most certainly can enjoy dating as a single parent. There are even websites specifically for single parents who want to date if you feel lie you’d rather date someone who is similar to you in that way.

Dealing with a jealous partner

opposite sex

Identify the Cause

Make the effort to understand what it is that is causing your partners insecurity and untrust, this will go a long way towards dealing with your partners jealousy issues. It is true that everyone is different and every circumstance is unique, however there are certain patterns to jealousy, and understanding the patterns will allow you adequately deal with the jealousy

  1. Insecurity: if you or your partner has an experience or starts thinking about issues that feel threatening to the relationship as a whole. This can result in neediness followed by emotional attacks and outbursts when the person who is feeling insecure feels their needs aren’t being addressed. Your partner may not feel good about themselves, about the kind of person they are, about the way that they look, and it may manifest as outbursts of jealousy.
  2. Inadequacy: You or your partner feels like they don’t measure up in some way. This can be sexual, emotional, intellectual; financial…essentially any of the ways people tend to compare themselves to others and make judgments. If your partner doesn’t feel as though they are good enough for you, they may feel jealous and intimidated by any attention you get from someone who they consider good enough for you. They then turn the situation around and decide that you are flirting and they become angry and jealous.
  3. Possessiveness: However immature it may be, a lot of people sometime like to feel as though their partners are their property. They think of them as “mine” and when they feel that someone or something is trespassing on “their” territory, they get upset.

Once you know which of the above categories your partner fits in to you can then begin to address the issue.

Honesty: In some cases, jealousy is actually justified, take a good look at the situation and ask yourself if the facts justify the way your partner is feeling. If your relationship is unstable, if you are treating them like they don’t measure up in comparison to someone else, then you need to ask yourself why. It might be that your relationship really needs some extra work or that you have been less than honourable. If this is so then those issues need to be addressed. After identifying the theme and cause of jealousy, you need to ask whether that jealousy is actually rational, and if so address those causes.

Realistic: on the other hand it is very true that people get jealous for irrational reasons or no reason at all. Feelings of insecurity or inadequacy are very strong and once they get set off, it feels like the end of the world, controlling those types of feelings can be very hard.


Once you have identified the problem they can be dealt with in the following ways:

  1. Set up a safe time and space to discuss the issues with your partner. A private, unthreatening, and neutral space like the living room is a good place to start. Set aside plenty of time so that neither of you feel pressured. Be aware that there may be long periods of silence where one or the other of you is trying to figure out how to talk about some very difficult feelings. Be patient and persevere!! Your relationship needs this.
  2. Bring up the jealousy and the effects it has had, how it has made you feel, address the patterns, scenarios and thoughts that led to them. Remember that feelings are sometimes not exactly rational, It is not necessary to justify feelings, and it is unfair for to demand that other people justify their emotions.
  3. Once you have figured out where the issues are and where they can be addressed, make a commitment to follow through on what you have decided and set a time to meet up in a couple weeks and see how it is working.
  4. Sit beside each other facing the same direction and make good eye contact; this avoids an atmosphere of battle. Hold hands or cuddle a bit while discussing things that make you upset. It is very hard to feel angry or threatened when our body language is receiving the message that we are loved.
  5. Do not use language that is unfair, exaggerates, or reinforces attitudes of ownership. Work towards eliminating such language from your vocabulary.
Both Sides of Special Interest Dating

Both Sides of Special Interest Dating

So you have met this terrific person that is into the same exact activities that you are into.  Most people would call this type of dating special interest dating because these activities may not be common like horse back riding, martial arts or even musicians.  It is one thing to have an open minded partner who is interested in learning what you know and another is a person who already participates in what you do.  In this way, you are able to collaborate together rather than have the teacher student dynamic in the relationship.

There are two very different sides to special interest dating.  Finding someone who enjoys what you love to do is a great way to meet this person first of all and then to spend time with them.  Life is so busy sometimes that between working and studying, the few hours that you have off, you want to spend them doing something that you love.  However, if you have a partner, you will be expected to spend time with this person.  With special interest dating, you can spend time with the person that you have or want to have a relationship with and do what you love to do.

You can learn a lot about your special interest from your partner’s point of view.  This could be valuable and interesting information that makes you fall deeper in love.  At this point, special interest dating seems to be the best type of dating out there.  Here comes the but.  A major downside of special interest dating is that if one day you do not want to pursue your special interest or can no longer do it, then you may lose the one bond that was holding your relationship together.  You may even become resentful if your partner can continue to participate while you cannot.

You may also lose your identity in special interest dating,  Many people pride themselves in having a talent.  When you share that talent with the person you love, you may feel like you are less special.  Therefore, if you want to feel good in your relationship and have a strong relationship despite having a common interest then it is important to have interests outside of your special interest.  If you are a martial artist, it may be better to train in different dojos.  If you are a musician, you may want to play in a different band then your partner.  This way you can keep your identities and separate your lives a little while still having a common interest to link each other together.

Getting laid through a dating site

Today I met with one of the members of a dating site I joined some time ago. It’s nice to find mature people that are interested only in one night stands… no strings attached. Of course, I’m picky about who I meet, and there was something special about this one. He’s been sending me messages for about 5 weeks now, and I could say I was impressed by his perseverance. He was not really my type… short, dark complexion and in his 50, but the way he wrote the messages was really hot.

We met at a small pub near my place. He suggested it so I guess he lives near by… and that he’s not a stalker. He couldn’t be. The site never gave away my identity before, so it was just a weird coincidence. He described himself perfectly, so it was easy for me to find him in there. He was a bit surprised when he saw me: ‘You look younger than 25… and too good to be true’. ‘I’m not showing you my ID, if that is what you’re aiming for’ I told him. He smiled. We started talking about each other, but not like in a typical date. We didn’t describe our likes and dislikes, but our sexual fantasies… and it all started with a sex joke. Of course, he told me that he was married, but he wasn’t wearing any ring… so he could have said that to make it clear that he wasn’t looking for a relationship. It was OK with me.

He said that he fantasizes about teenagers, and that I almost look like one. That was weird, but it managed to turn me on. He talked about how he would be the teacher and punish the girl for not paying attention in class. ‘I need to use the bathroom. Be right back’. I went to the toilet, to freshen up. Actually, I went in there to make him a surprise. I pulled my hair in two ponytails, and when I came back, he smiled and asked if I wanted to continue back at his place. So we went there.

Fortunately for me, his place was in the opposite side of the city, so I guess he chose the meeting location because of that. We went up into his apartment, and he gave me a drink. ‘Young lady, should you be drinking that?’ I think he started to play out his fantasy. ‘Sorry Sir, please don’t tell my parents.’

‘You’ve been a very bad girl! Turn around!’

I turned around and he lifted my skirt up. ‘You naughty little girl! Does you mommy know you are wearing thong?’ Then, he went to sit on the sofa, and told me to come there, pointing at his lap. I came near him and he put me on his lap with my ass pointing up. He grabbed the back of the thong and stretched it at its limit. Then he let it slap me, and repeated it for several times. If felt good. The front of my thong was all wet and he saw that. He pulled my head back from one of the ponytails and he put his finger in my pussy. ‘You like that, don’t you?’

‘Yes, Sir.’

‘Now be a good girl and make me happy’

He lifted me up and opened his fly. His cock was quite small, but it was rock hard and thick. It wasn’t hard for me to put it all in my mouth. I sucked it until he came, which didn’t take him long. But his cock was still hard, so I laid on the sofa, waiting for him to fuck me from behind. He slapped my ass really hard and then put his cock inside. As wet as I was, it still hurt a bit when he did it. I guess I was too tight for it, but it felt amazing. I come before him, but he managed to make me come again before his number was over.

That was quite a good experience. I should accept Internet dates more often. It seams that today was another good day for science…

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