Some women really enjoy giving a blow job, other do it just to please their partner. If she doesn’t want to give you one, don’t pressure her or force her, or emotionally black mail her. If she offers to give you one, appreciate it and don’t push your luck.
1. You try to force her head down there
You started the foreplay and while she’s kissing you on your mouth, neck, chest and stomach, your hand is on her head, trying to push her down there. It’s not quite a turn on to be forced to do something. If you see that she resist against your shy push, don’t insist because it’s not that she didn’t get the hint, it’s just that she doesn’t want to give you a blow job. You should try understanding where she stands. So don’t insist because even if she does give it to you, it won’t be because she wanted to. If she agrees to do it, don’t force your penis in her throat if she is not ready or doesn’t like it. Chocking her is not really a way of making her feel good.
2. You hold her hands or her head while she is down there
It might turn you on to be in total control but don’t hold her head while she gives you a blow job. Or, you can hold it as long as you don’t try to control her moves. There are sex toys for that purpose and you can move them as you wish, but your partner isn’t one. Let her be in control of what she is doing and also, don’t hold her hands. In this case, it’s not romantic at all and she might not enjoy pleasuring you if she feels constrained in any way. Of course, if you like this stuff, then talk it over before having sex and see if she enjoys it too.
3. You come in her mouth without asking
This is rude and in some cases even disrespectful. Always ask before you come in her mouth. Don’t make up lame excuses like you didn’t have the time to tell her or you didn’t know you were about to come. Some women don’t enjoy having your sperm in their mouth and she won’t enjoy the sex afterwards.
Make sure you have a good finish for both of you
The finish is as important as the sex and the prelude. Both of you need to be satisfied and sometimes it’s not all about coming.
1. You stop before she had her climax and you don’t make up for it
A woman needs to know you care about her pleasure as well, so give your best not to come before she had her share. If you do, don’t roll over and fall asleep. You can continue giving pleasure even after you came and especially if she is still aroused. Leaving her unfinished when she almost came can be frustrating. Could you handle that every time? Imagine you stopping before you ejaculate and then letting the pleasure die in a slow way. Do something about it!
2. You don’t control your ejaculation
Don’t excuse yourself for not being able to control your ejaculation. If you try and practice, you can do it, so you just have to give a damn! No matter what your partner does to you or how she moves, you are the one who can best control your ejaculation – don’t blame it on her. If you ejaculate, make sure you don’t make an unwanted mess. Control yourself not to come on her face or her body is she doesn’t want you to. And if you make a mess, offer to help with the cleaning no matter where it is.
3. You shout in her ears while you come
You are embracing each other as you are about to come and you start making loud sounds. If you are screaming next to her ear you not only risk of making her def (just kidding), but it also distracts her attention from the pleasure. So, if you scream in her ear, she might loose all the accumulated pleasure and not be able to come. The fun is ruined and you were the only one who had fun.
4. You mark your territory
No, not similar to a lion! But you leave her with love marks that she might be embarrassed about the next day. No mature woman goes to work bragging with ‘Look what my wild partner did to me last night’ – only in your fantasies, perhaps. So don’t leave her with marks, especially if they can’t be hidden. You are not a teenager who needs to show himself and to other people that he did actually get some.
5. You don’t bond after having sex
The best bonding that take place between couples is the one that happens after sex. Hug your partner for a few minutes and let the cigarette or the shower wait for a bit. It is proven that certain hormones are released when two people hug after sex and they are the ones making both of you feel comfortable and secure. I think this is quite important so do something about it.
Women like the journey, not only the outcome. Do this often and not once or occasionally, for her birthday or for Christmas. Respect your partner even during sex and make your best to ensure that both of you get what you want out of sex.